I actually forgot to say that we were due for the littles Friday, but I called and cancelled late the evening before. I had my daughter and William, but was not feeling my best. I still had the wedding dress and was feeling stress. I felt bad cancelling at the last minute but they do have a full time sitter. We are just free and I know it helps them, plus I love the kids.
I was finally able to get the last of the years wedding dress done just in the nick of time. I told daughter I was starting to panic.. Her reply was "Well where is the fun if you don't." Who raised that smart a%^?
I was so grateful daughter wrapped several things for me and mailed all but one of the gifts to daughters family so that is off my list. She even wrapped the gifts for the church Christmas tree so I don't have to do that. Have I ever told you I hate wrapping presents? I am bad at it and mine always look like a 5 yer old did them. I just don't have the patience. Yet I dislike gift bags as I think unwrapping is important. Yeah just part of the ongoing mental illness we call Kim.:)
I woke this morning with no DIET COKE in the house. Which is a major crisis. I also have severely achy hands. Not a good sign. When I picked up my meds Thursday I noticed the steroid was cut in half so I was happy, but two days later and bang. I know I will spend a good part of the day at Lil sis's getting ready for mom's open house. I am waiting for her phone call. As I know she likes to sleep in on Saturdays.
I need to go to the bank today and I just got done throwing loaves of bread into my mixer. I think I really can admit that I dislike store bought bread. I love the Daves killer bread, but refuse to pay almost $5.00 a loaf for it. You can make the same for about .50 a loaf.
I have been really weepy all morning and I don't know why. I think I am missing mom and now that the open house is upon us I am over flowing with emotions. Also not feeling well and realizing the meds are not working and the doctors strategy to try and boost the Xeljanz (med) is not working. I hate the thought of having to switch meds. It will probably have to be a drip in now and I will have to check into an outpatient place and sit in the freezing cold for several hours, then suffer the extreme side affects for several days. I am being a dooms dayer right now. I need to shake myself. But I keep crying.
Hubs got called down to the school today as there are problems in the theater. He just called and was asked to stay. This is good as he would be beside himself with my crying. I will take some warm bread and butter down to the school later for the crew and then go to Lil sis's.
Boy am I a mess. Crying always gives me a headache. Plus it makes me look lovely.
Have a great and productive day staying positive while you are in the negative.
Kim
I am so impressed with your card and reduction system. You have done a great job and should be very proud of yourself.
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed that the meds will work without infusions.
I am an ugly crier so I refuse to cry.
I bet I could make you cry. I would work hard at it:)
Delete(((HUGS))) Kim. This can be a very emotional time of year for many of us, and, I imagine, especially for you with your mother passing away so recently. Of course, you miss her! She lived with you and she was a part of your daily life.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your daughter was able to do your wrapping and some of your mailing for you. I've never known anyone as busy on a daily basis as you!
I hope the medications work well and you won't need to get infusions. I hate having to switch medications, myself. They always end up having to give more medications for the side effects of one medication and then, additional stuff for the side effects of that medication!
I hope the rest of the day goes well and your mom's open house proceeds smoothly. Take care.
Thanks Bless. My right wrist is very wonky as carpel tunnel has set in due to swelling of the joints. So glad it is a slow time of year for the shop.
DeleteTry getting off Diet Coke. (I did and it was not easy! Diet Pepsi for me.) But if you Google it, you will see numerous sources that link diet drinks to joint pain.
ReplyDeleteYou know I am seriously going to consider that.
DeleteI actually LOVE to wrap presents. It's a real joy for me. If I lived near you, I'd BEG you to let me wrap your gifts. I once brought all my wrapping supplies to a church craft party, and offered to wrap the older ladies' presents for them...I understand how their hands don't work the same way as they age. (More so this year than ever, as I am experiencing the pain.) I am also the type who detests gift bags. I'm not wild about press on bows, either. Lately, though, my hands cramp up when tying bows, so I have been using the press on types more, but always with ribbon...never alone.
ReplyDeleteYesterday was my weepy day. Since my DH doesn't deal with sad well, I took a lot of walks with the dog. I look deranged when I cry. On one of my walks yesterday, DS drove past me on his way to class and actually backed up the truck, rolled down the window, and asked if everything was o.k. He said I looked like I had been hitting the eggnog a bit too heavily.
Don't you love kids? I wish you were close we could go walk our dogs and cry together. You could wrap my gifts and I could sew for you.
DeleteWell I am also in the crying club the past couple of days also. Missing many family members that are gone. I find it very cathartic. This weekend I will be with my inlaws, my husband died 23 years ago at the age of 41. His brothers look just like him and will be enjoying their kids/grandkids ..... my four children and 12 grandchildren will miss out on so much. Boo hoo, and it's not like I dwell on this but there are times. I will continue to recognize my blessings but I needed these cry days. I also love wrapping so will watch another Christmas movie and wrap some more. ( and some chocolate will increase my endorphins ).
ReplyDeleteHow hard to lose a husband so early. Then to have brother in laws that look just like him. Crying does help a little.
DeleteKim, I hope you are feeling better soon. I was in a crying mood on Thursday (due to a big disagreement with the hubby) Doesn't happen very often but he really hurt my feelers!! All better now. Hope your's is over soon. I'm sure you miss your mom. She was a BIG part of your life! HUGS!! AND HANG IN THERE!
ReplyDeleteThanks. My Lil sis helped alot.
DeleteThe medication roulette, I know it well. I'm proud of you for putting yourself first, a bit, and not babysit. You'll have days of sadness-thats ok. Give yourself permission to grieve.
ReplyDeleteI think the combination of diseases and grief are really getting to me.
DeleteSending good thoughts and hugs your way, Kim. This can be a sad time of year for some. I hope you feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks Belinda!
DeleteHugs to you, Kim. Illness plus bereavement is a tough combo.
ReplyDelete