Monday, December 6, 2021

Monday, Home and rung out


 Well I am home again, and I feel like a rung out dish rag.  It was a long few days with lots of work and plenty of family.

We were able to have a wonderful memorial service for the babies and many blessings came our families way throughout the days we set up for the service.

Missoula bent over backwards to support Travis and the children.  Almost all business refused to take money for services or greatly reduced their fees, we were amazed at the generosity of people.  There is so much good in the world.


The children's favorite color was purple, and this was the back drop of the church.  I was so touched.  Those two hanging's on either side were hand done by parishioners and then given to the family after the service.  It was just amazing.


            As you left the church they had these boy and girl angel hangings which were so perfect for our babies. It was just so wonderful all the amazing things that were just in place for our family. 

Lil sis, Sissie and I worked hard and ran around  for three days gathering things and meeting with the pastor, constant phone calls and txts, to people involved.  It was a lot of work, but I am so happy we did this. There is no way Travis could have pulled it off without help.This brought us together as a family and I know my mother would have been pleased by our efforts.



I was so proud of Travis and the older daughter's at the funeral.  They spoke and they did such a good job.  The older girls, talked about how strong these children were and their devotion to one another. They were so young yet looked out for one another with adult actions.

Travis spoke last and I will try and write what he said.

He had been crying for over 30 hours and his family decided they would walk the few blocks to the house where the children had passed and set up a memorial.  As he got to the house, he was so overcome by grief when he approached the porch he fell on his knees sobbing. He said,  he felt little arms wrap around his neck from either side.  He felt the embrace of his children.  They spoke to his soul and said they were all right, they loved him, they knew he loved them.  They also told him there was nothing he could have done to save them.  He felt his anger and grief lift and he felt the strength of those two children's souls flow into him.  He said he would be forever changed, but for the better, as he would use this strength to try and change the system that failed these two babies. It was a very emotional testimony. He was so strong. We were all so proud of him.

I have only cried three times this morning so I am getting better:)

I am facing Christmas hell here, with boxes all over the front room and I am making myself decorate.  I forgot to take my meds yesterday as we drove home and I have a really bad headache today and much nausea, but I am trying to work through it.  We had Oliver for a little while this morning as his parents had dental appointments, and he was a joy.  Hub's is going to get Schmills and Kelsa this afternoon.  

I am trying to get the all the towels and linens washed so I can begin with the bathrooms.  Schmills loves to decorate,this so it will be fun for him to help grandma. Just moving slowly, one room at a time, or maybe all rooms at a time.

Hub's mom is going to be with us for Christmas and a few or maybe many weeks after, we do not know.  But hubs will go get her and bring her up.

Sissie, Lil sis, Lil sis's oldest daughter and I all shared a donated hotel room and  we had lots of laughs and many tears,but you remember the laughter.  Our family are all very funny.  We are born comedians, I think it is the Jewish heritage.  We can take the most awful circumstance and twist it to humor. Even Travis and his older girls have that wicked sense of humor. It sustains us, sick as that sounds.

Now I just want to get back to my life.  But I am having a hard time. I know I will adjust.  I just have to keep busy.

Thank you all again for all your love and support, it has meant the world to me.


Kim

24 comments:

  1. I firmly believe that God sent the babies down from heaven to help heal their dad in his grief.
    I have been thinking about your family and sending my prayers.

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    1. I also believe this, God is good and our refuge in times of trial.

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  2. I am so with you on the laughter and it's healing power.
    I am glad this part of the ordeal is over and I hope your nephew has some time for healing. I know there will be so many things that will keep this in the forefront of his life for quite a while yet. Prayers for him.
    Now don't over-do and try to be superwoman! I learned the best lesson from TheHawaiian Planner. Christmas should be festive without being overwhelming. It is perfectly fine for things to be "different" this year.

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    1. I am the least 0verdoing person I know right now.

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  3. The Lord works in mysterious ways! Your nephew did feel those babies and they did speak to him - I firmly believe that. Your Mom was aware of everything, and I guarantee you she was smiling down at her girls.
    How wonderful of the community to reach out. We hear bad every day, and there is so much good. Thank you for reminding us of that.
    Don't go crazy - go slow and steady and you will be fine. HUGS to you all.

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    1. I am moving at a snails pace right now, but at least forward. Isn't God good, so merciful in this trial.

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  4. okay, I cried so I could barely read, not sobbing but flowing tears. I hope you can work enough to get your mind together as well as the decorating, but not so much you make yourself sick. I hate when I miss medicine!

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    1. I am trying but it is slow going. I will recover I think.

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  5. Like you & Anne, I also find laughter helps, even during otherwise inappropriate times. Big hugs!

    And yes, absolutely, Christmas should be festive without being overwhelming. My mom & sister would cringe at our decorations (we have a tree, a mantle with lights & outdoor lights). That's it. It's very simple. The tree & mantle take about an hour to put up & slightly less to take down. The outdoor lights do take a few hours. I make one special bread, and wrap some gifts. We really try to enjoy the holidays & make them special, without driving ourselves crazy. We're moderately successful. ;-0

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    1. I love to decorate and it is okay if you are a minimal decorator, we all do what we like.

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  6. Those poor little ones. But I'm glad that you and your sisters were able to help your nephew during this awful time. What a testimony from your nephew, and what a comfort for him. May your grandchildren and family be a comfort for you.

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  7. There is nothing sick in finding humor. You all use it as needed and you understand each other.

    So wonderful that the community pulled together in support of the family. Thank you for all you and your sisters did as well.

    Take good care of YOU now so you can be well.

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  8. I'm back glad the community supported you all. How hugs to you all. Love every moment with your babies.

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  9. oh Kim, I am so sorry to read of what has happened. I am just catching up on blog reading, what a tragic situation, thank goodness Travis has had the three of you to help over the last few days. sending hugs and condolences xx

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  10. I truly believe he felt the presence of his children. What a wonderful thing for him. What a wonderful thing to hear.
    Remember, the holidays aren't about perfection, they are about making memories. So sit back and hug your loved ones and have a little fun this holiday season. That is what is important.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Lori, God is so good to us when we need it.

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  11. God Bless you Kim, God Bless you.
    J.P. in the U.K.

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  12. Oh goodness, so sorry , sending hugs and prayers to you and yours!

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  13. What a beautiful testimony, and what a blessing for you all. Love endures...

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