Got home from Twin Falls yesterday and it was a long drive. It takes at least 8 hours with stops. Aunty went right to bed when we got home. Just sitting in a car is exhausting, but she was so happy to see Jess and the boys. It was nice to see Joel's mom also.
I arrived home and picked up the mail and received a card form Anne in the Kitchen. She also saves all her $5 bills and then uses them for charity. I was her charity of choice this last month. She sent me 6 five-dollar bills for my trip with my daughter to Hawaii. Wasn't that wonderful. I had come home from Twin Falls and added my 5's to the pot and now had $395.00 saved and with Anne's card I am up to $425.00. So nice to be loved and thought of. Thank you, Anne!
Home to a pile of work that I am trying to avoid. Also, my little seedlings need to be transplanted badly. I am really excited about doing this and I am using this as a tool to force myself to get work done in the shop. I will use almost anything to get my butt moving.
It was C.S. Lewis who said, "I didn't know grief was so much like fear." I can really relate to that. Fear of the unknown, fear of the mind, fear of the tears, fear of offending others, fear of being a burden, fear of inactivity, fear of being misunderstood, fear of losing one's temper, fear of loneliness, fear of financial upheaval, fear of not being able to do something that needs done. Just so many fears that you have to navigate through. I do not like being fearful. I try to have faith, but sometimes it just isn't there.
This blog helps me so much to get my feelings out, so I am not wallowing. Oh, who am I kidding I do wallow sometimes.
So rather than wallow, I am going to make a list of things to get done today.
1. put on some makeup
2. make my bed
3. finish the laundry
4. replace two zippers
5. go to Joanns for a zipper.
6. Get a large pile of mending done.
7. alter at least one wedding dress.
8. transplant seedlings, but only after I have completed list!
9. replace a zipper
10. get a pile done
Don't I have an exciting life??
Have a great and productive day staying positive while you are in the negative.
Kim
Some days the only thing you need to accomplish is breathing through the entire day. As you feel more like it, and adjust to life now, you will do more.
ReplyDeleteI love that you place put on makeup as the first thing on your list. A little paint always makes me feel better, but since I have none on I can be a sloth today.
I do feel better when I put on a little make up. I am so pale I think I look like a pie.
DeleteMaybe fear is a nudge to do something, a reminder.
ReplyDeleteWhen I needed to sew or get anything done, makeup was not even on the list. I would work to get things done that I did not want to be pushed into doing while I was exhausted or after I had lost the light. I could put on makeup or make the bed during a break or when I was exhausted. The quality of bedmaking or applying makeup was not important. Sewing was.
With all your traveling, you certainly seem to be a merry widow. Good for you!
I cannot recall the last time I had a $5 bill in my hand! Great windfall for your trip.
Merry Widow ?
DeleteAnnie
@Practical Parsimony. That seemed to be a very unkind remark -- "merry widow"
DeleteI just feel better when I have a routine and I can walk into a room and it is clean. I work better when I feel better. It just works for me. I had a bugger of a wedding dress come in this morning and I was wondering how you would fix it. I needed another mind.
DeleteHave a great day. Regine
ReplyDeletewww.rsrue.blogspot.com
thanks Regine to you also.
DeleteSo glad you got back from the trip and all was safe. It is funny how a little thing like make-up can lift your mood. If I am having a really bad day - I go put on a little- it usually cheers me a bit.
ReplyDeleteWhat a kind and wonderful gift you received. That was so thoughtful. I am tickled that you get to see family. I hope Joel's mom is well.
She is great but is getting more fragile. At 95 she is doing a great deal more than most her age. I am proud of her.
DeleteWhat a nice surprise. I'm sure it made your day.
ReplyDeleteIt did, it lifted me all day long.
DeleteGlad you made it home safely from your trip, and that you made Aunty happy. What a lovely surprise to find in the mail.
ReplyDeleteOne step, one breath at a time.
God bless.
I know Jackie, but it is so hard. Breath...
DeleteYou go right on doing what feels best or works best for you, from wallowing to making the bed to whatever!
ReplyDeleteI do and I will because I am like that!
DeleteSo nice of Anne! I hope you are able to make progress with your to do list.
ReplyDeleteCindy of the South
Well, I am catching up on a few piles and hope to get to a couple of wedding dresses today!
DeleteGlad you made it home safely. That is a long drive. How sweet was that of Anne! I am so happy for you about your upcoming trip to my home state of Hawaii!
ReplyDeleteYou do what feels right for you...grief is like riding waves I think...at least that is how it feels to me.
It was a very long drive and Joel and I always split it up. But it was a good way of showing myself I can do it myself.
DeleteWhat wonderful friends you have! And, i think it’s so, so nice that you have your Aunt staying with you. We’re in the middle of nowhere with no family within 7-8 hours and no aunts or uncles left on my side, one on my husbands. I would love to have visitors to hang out with! Family and friends are everything!
ReplyDeleteDebbie
They really are and I will be sad to see Aunty leave.
DeleteI’m glad your trip was a safe one. That was so sweet of Anne! She is such a sweetie. 💕
ReplyDeleteShe is wonderful. SO much fun, so generous. You cannot find many like her.
DeleteI enjoy your blog and have learned a lot from the circumstances you are going thru. Please know that I am sorry for your loss and that your experiences are helping me to understand what might happen when and if I lose my B and I must deal with the after effects. I pray for you always.
ReplyDeleteOh Ellen that means so much to me.
DeleteSo glad you had a nice trip. I've been thinking about Joel's Mom - how is she doing?
ReplyDeleteShe is doing great for her age. I do worry about her. But she still wants her independence.
Delete