Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Wednesday,Chart completed and remembering

Well I completed chart #11 and I am onto #12!  I hope to complete that before the end of the month.  Wouldn't that be nifty?

We had to call in an electrician yesterday due to a smoking, stuck on light switch that froze the fan on in our bathroom.  Not a project I would let Hub's tackle.  I wouldn't be able to tell if his shaking was due to his parkinson's tremor or electrical current.  I had the electrician fix another light in the garage that is stuck on and also replace the outside porch light that has been broken for over a year.  I replaced it with a motion sensor.  We have had skunk and badger sightings in the neighborhood and I am hoping this will help keep them at bay.  We have  three lights in the front wall of the house that are not working so we are trying to fix those also.  I don't know how much this will set us back, but it will be done.


We went to the cemetery while we were in Missoula to clean up all the family graves.  We were going to do this when we were there for mom but it got away from us. Here is Hub's using a pocket knife to clean around our daughters head stone.  Going there did bring back memories and I have to say I was just as goofy after her death as I have been with moms.  I was trying to graduate with a double major and she came a few weeks early, throwing papers, and projects into chaos.  My professors were so kind.  Not many women went to school pregnant at that time.  I had turned down a job a Boeing because I was to have a new baby and then  I had no baby.  I was a mess for about a good month and then took a job with a company in Idaho.  I swear I cried everyday all the way to work for an entire year. Hub's was over seas at the time.  It was vary hard.  So now I realize that what I am going through is normal and I will be okay.  Franka was a darling short, fat little baby.  She looked like me.  All my other girls look like their dad.


     This did give me a perspective on normal.  I am normal.  The brain fog is normal.  It will pass and I will be left with good memories as long as I don't dig too deep.

     The shop was crazy busy yesterday.  So much for catching up.  So I have plenty to do.  We ate entirely out of the garden last night, but I am going to add some meat tonight as I was hungry at about 10 p.m.  I did do 10 pieces of ironing yesterday.  So I am making some progress just not as much as I need to or would like.  Today I will be better.  I need to go to the bank and finish a couple of bridesmaid dresses and two wedding dresses.  Also I have several pairs of pants to alter, and couple of zippers to replace.  So I will not be bored that is for sure.


Have a a great and productive day staying positive while you are in the negative.!

Kim


18 comments:

  1. I didn't realize you had a baby to die. I am so sorry. What happened that she died? All that crying is understandable.

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    1. She was born with Hypo plastic lung syndrome, which is still a death sentence. These baby's are almost 99% girls, and they are full term, they just have heart and lung abnormalities.Average life expectancy now is 2 weeks.

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    2. I am so sorry. It is making me cry. You ironed ten more pieces than I have in the last 20 years.

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  2. Oh girl - YOU ARE NORMAL! I didn't realize that you had lost a baby in days gone by. So many hugs your way.
    Girl you got 10 more pieces ironed yesterday than I have ironed in the last 2 years! You are doing good!

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    1. She was such a beautiful little girl, fat and round.

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  3. I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious daughter Franka all those years ago and I am so sorry that you and your husband had to go through it all so far apart. ((((((HUGS))))). My heart aches for you.

    Good job on finishing another chart and on the ironing. I am really glad you had an electrician come in and take care of those sticking lights...how scary is that? Yikes! My anxiety would have been going through the roof until that was taken care of.

    Be blessed and be good to you!

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    1. It was a hard time, but she is waiting for me, so that is a blessing. Yes, when the smoke appeared I got on it immediately.

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  4. I don't understand. I responded to this at about 11 am. Now, your blog post showed up at the top of my blog list as published one hour ago. Anyone understand this?

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  5. I can't even imagine how heartbreaking it must have been to lose a baby - thankfully, you can keep your memories of her alive forever and your mom is probably rocking her right this minute!

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  6. I am sorry you are having to relive the memories of losing your first child while grieving your mother's passing. Life throws lots of curve balls but I am sincerely glad you are remembering that feeling foggy and somewhat lost is the norm.
    I think of you often, especially those days I am having a difficult time with mom, and realize those days are definitely numbered.

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    1. I would like to say cherish them while you can, but I really did not cherish them. She wanted so badly to go and she was ready.

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  7. Hopefully within the sadness of memory, the beauty is remembered as well. I hear her beauty in your words. Grief is normal and how you respond and what you need is unique to you.

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  8. Thank you for sharing the precious memory of your daughter. Even though it was long ago, the memory and sadness for the loss is still there. That must have been such a hard time for you. I love the sentiment shared above, of your mother rocking the baby. It is such a comfort to know that you will see her someday. I'm glad you are realizing that it is going to take time to work through your mom's death, as it did with your sweet daughter's. Hang in there, and give yourself grace.

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