Friday, April 6, 2018

Friday, Set backs, Attitude is everything

     In this long and crazy adventure of becoming debt free, we have had many set backs.  There have been true expensive emergencies.  There have been expensive aggravations.  There have been children.  There have been stupid mistakes. There have been down turns because I just got tired and lazy, and went on a bender.

Some of you might remember the Sewer Collapse, which we are still paying for.  It was one expensive mess.  I had a total melt down.

Eye surgeries really stopped me.

Constant infections  have slowed me down

We have had car repairs

Flooding in the basement

Unemployed children

A business that was taking too much out of me with no real financial return.

Just outside forces that worked against my plan and could  and did derail me.

I would cry and whine and curse my life.  But no one came to rescue me and I just had to pick myself up and move on.

I should not have let mom start remodeling the kitchen, but I did and incurred more debt

I love to shop and have often bought things I did not need.

The funny thing now is that I realize what a learning process this is.  I wanted instant gratification.  I am blue about my debt so I go shopping to make myself feel better and the trinket does until I realize I am more in debt.

Now I don't even want the trinket, in fact I am purging many of those things from my life.  When I don't shop and buy nonsense I can pay off bills and see progress  and that feeling of progress is lasting. It is empowering.

SO if you are on the same trail I am on , what set backs have you had and how do you re-motivate yourself to go on?


Have a great and productive day staying positive while you are in the negative.

Kim


16 comments:

  1. I fall off the "pay the debt" wagon often. And when I become overwhelmed with family issues, money issues, spouse issues, I will either go shopping, (Target is my go to!) And/or I will take myself out to eat. Entitlement is my problem.

    I admire your tenacity to get through each struggle and continue to pay off debt. I am less reliable with my own tenacity. It is what it is.

    Your dedication is evident, and I appreciate that you share your victories and battles. I tend to disappear into thin air ( I stop blogging) because the truth of my own blunders is too painful.

    Hang in there, sister! You are totally awesome!

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    1. It has taken me years Lisa to reach this place and I will still blunder, believe me.

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  2. It's called life, baby--and you are getting through it great! So many times folks forget that while yes, life will get them down, it's up to them to get themselves back up. I see evidence in your posts that you are constantly pulling yourself up, and that encourages me to do the same. Have a good weekend!

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    1. Thanks, I try to hide it but it is rough here. Mostly mom problems. You just have to keep going.

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  3. What really helps me is reading blogs like yours - it keeps me motivated and just when I think I can't do this anymore, you put up a post like this that speaks to me and gives me more incentive to go on knowing I am not alone.

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    1. You are not alone my dear, not by a long shot.

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  4. Life rollercoaster's, even the most disciplined need to hold on tight and brace for the downtimes. I hate shopping, so not much issue there, but I binge watch crap or binge eat food or binge drink when it gets too much. Cut yourself some slack, know there will be jags, and accept. Perhaps do your therepy shops in grocery stores-special stuff you don't ever treat uourself to. At least you won't have to clear it out later.

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    1. Good Idea, but I have really cut back over the last two years and now my shopping is almost non existent. I actually have not purchased even one piece of clothing this year. Almost unheard of. I wish I had your will power.

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  5. The worst one for me was loaning someone a healthy sum of money and never getting repaid. You can't get blood out of a stone and you can't get money back from someone who lives only on social security. Another was a van I bought that needed a transmission shortly after buying it and continued to need constant repairs. A third was selling a house at a loss. Oh, I could go on and on...yet I now have no debt so it can be done and yes it's a sacrifice but totally worth it. You have done so well Kim, even after your long list of money wasters.

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    1. Thanks Jane. I am feeling so trapped right now, not so much with debt but with mom. Actually the ability to work and pay off is the one thing I can do that brings me happiness.

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  6. Really, the only thing that seems to motivate me is the feeling of shame. For example, in Dec.of 2016 i had to borrow money from my daughter to get our phones turned back on. It was so embarrassing, especially when i found out one of my sisters knew our phones were turned off and was getting ready to pay for them to be turned back on. I really wish I was motivated by charts or graphs, but if i cant create a perfect one, i get discouraged. You know, sometimes the only thing that motivates me to clean my house is knowing someone is coming over! I have started blogging in hopes that I can find motivation with that outlet. I ennoy reading your blog!!

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    1. You sound just like me about 20 years ago. I have a tendency to be stalled by perfection. If I can't do it all perfectly today it can't be done. Well guess what? It can't:) Move on. or over and hand me that TV remote......

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  7. I remember feeling totally overwhelmed by our debt a few years ago and we both had lost our jobs - and we had huge debts - it seemed as if we would never get past it. Reading debt blogs really helped me keep going and turn it around - blogs where people were just honest about their day to day life - the ups and the downs. I agree with what you said about spending money, I just don't want 'things / trinkets or 'stuff'.

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    1. I have found that it really helps me. I still want the trinkets, I just know that they won't make me happy in the long run.

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  8. My life motto is "it is what it is." That usually keeps me going. Taking 5 (or more) minutes to breathe deeply and focus on what's important for me right then right now also helps. It usually gets me past the low spots.

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    1. I think my whole weekend was low spots, so I am going to try that April. Thanks.

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