Open house a success, mother happy also a success. How long did the happiness last, not long enough. I had such plans for Monday. Mother was not going to control my day and I was finally going to be able to get at lest part of my house cleaned and ready for Christmas.
Well mom had other plans and she was ready with her list of have too's when I got downstairs yesterday. I had made an appointment to take my car in as the power steering was in a funk. I was panicky about it as the car has 140,00 miles and we have never done anything but change the oil every 3-5 thousand miles and buy new tires. Here it is Christmas I am still in financial recovery from the kitchen and the car is on the fritz.( car was only $120.00, replaced belts, timing belt was fine, brakes have a few more years, but must get new tires)
Hub's and I took car to our mechanic's house and then stopped to get hooks for stockings that were lost some time during remodel, then did the old people tour to see who needed to be shoveled out. When we got home mom was raring to go. I did not want to leave as the streets were icy and I had plans like cleaning my house and getting Christmas put where it belongs, not in piles all over.
So I gritted my teeth and made her go in the truck ( which she hates) She complained the whole way to the bank about the way I was going ( I needed to avoid hills and ice). When I got her to the bank they could not count her change, which I told her would happen, so we had to go down to my credit union. Then she had to go way across over to Washington to make a hair appointment. We can't just use the phone? Then we had to go to sister's to get some left overs. Which entailed carrying tray after bowel after tray out to the truck. When we got home I drove truck right up to garage door as the driveway is steep and icy. She gets out and goes into the house giving me the list of what she wants on a plate heated up. I am then left to haul all the crap into the house. I slipped holding a tray of lefsa and slid and then fell between the truck and the garbage cans. Hit my elbow, then my knee then rang my head good. Lefsa all over, I was so pissed. No help just me the driveway and the underside of the pickup.
When I got myself into the house I threw the biggest fit I have thrown in a long time. I swore and threw things and made Hub's carry the rest of the crap upstairs. I threw mom's purse across the room and I think I scared her. She did not ask for anything for about 4 hours.It is just so hard to have to everything for someone who is helpless but insists that they are not.
I laid down the rest of the afternoon and then mom was working on her room. I told her to stop as she could not do it herself and I wanted to get the upstairs done. But no she gets herself stuck trying to move and antique mirror. I have to stop what I am doing and get her room and bath done FIRST. At least it is done. So I have something to be grateful for.
Well she needs breakfast so I am off, have to teach at 4 and I hope to accomplish something in the house today.
have a great and productive day!
KIm
Not going to be popular but is it time for your mom in a nursing home? You seem to be very stressed (I would have a ulcer by now) and you can't watch her all the time. Cheryl. My mom was in a home, I know the guilt but I couldn't care for her anymore and both my sisters worked full-time.
ReplyDeleteI am and I am getting depressed. I am hoping it passes. I think too many holiday expectations. I am also very tired. But I will work it out.
Delete
ReplyDelete"It is just so hard to have to everything for someone who is helpless but insists that they are not"
I hear you loud and clear and clear and loud! Mom still lives in her own home, but she can't lock the door because even though I bought interior keyless deadbolts (knowing she did not have the strength to turn a key ) she listened to the installer (volunteer for local Sr. Citizens organization) who told her she needed keyed locks. So now she has locks she cannot work. Great!
I feel your pain
Delete