Mom had the same procedure yesterday morning that she had a few months ago. She is home and doing fine. I am not going over, I told my sisters that one of them can go. They call me a martyr, but after 35 years and they both live clear across the country, I am the one who drops everything and rushes over to the parents. I don't mind really, but I am the least able to financially afford it. Both of them have very high powered jobs and seem to be able to take many very expensive vacations a year so why not save a little time for Mom? Also I have not been supported on any decisions I make at my mothers house by either of them. They always see how I did it wrong, or they would have done it differently. So my suggestion was that one of them go. They can pay for a plane ticket (I will save $200.00 in gas). They can miss work(I can save $250.00 on substitute wages, and $4-500.00 in missed sewing jobs) They can deal with the badly repaired house and the smokey nasty air from my brothers smoking( oh they smoke so that is okay) Then they can put up with my brothers violent outbursts and behavior that my mother seems to ignore( he needs to be institutionalized and has been many times). Gee I get to miss all of this. Love my Mom to death but no matter what I do it is wrong. My brother is very scary and my Mother is scared of him. The neighbors all know the situation but can do nothing until my Mom makes the decision to make him leave. She won't give up on her child. I do not understand this but I have never been put in her position.yet. I say yet because you never know what your kids may or may not become. She has three daughters that are high over achievers and two sons that scrape the bottom of any societies barrel, what went wrong?
Out My Window: I was able to clean out another large flower bed yesterday, and also trim all the ivy on a 100 foot rock wall. I am not going to work in the yard today as it is a long teaching day and I am behind in the shop.
Good News! Daughter # 2 has a job interview in Post Falls. This is about 2 hours away from us, I hope she gets it, she can live with friends of ours as we have their son living with us! What a trade.
I was able to take in $550.00 in tuition last night, still have one family that did not pay, she did not have the check book and offered her CC, I said no and to bring me the money tomorrow. So I will be expecting this when I go down to the studio today. Today is my long teaching day and I have to clean daughters building tonight.
I have several dresses for homecoming to get done in the next few days, so I am off to the salt mines!
Have a great and productive day!
Kim
I am so sorry for everything going on with your mom, you are a great daughter.
ReplyDeleteGlad your down to only one non paying parent, hope she pays you tonight.
I really dont know how you do all of it in one day, I get tired just reading about your day
Judy
It's great that you are getting all your tuition paid up! One less battle for you.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you with the situation with your mom and sisters. My mom has some issues with her sisters and my nan's care as well. It's difficult for sure! Glad to hear your mom is doing better.
Hope the interview goes well for D#2!
You sure do work hard Kim! I am blessed that my four siblings and I all helped out when my parents were elderly and ill. My mom had Parkinson's and went quickly, my dad suffered from anxiety, depression and OCD (on top of prostate cancer and melanoma - sheesh!!) but we all pitched in.
ReplyDeleteIt is tough to be in your position and I think you made the right decision to pass on the responsibility to another sibling this time round!
I do what you can but I'm glad to see you are letting the sibs handle it this time.
ReplyDeleteHubs was in the same position with his mom. He had 3 siblings all older than him who couldn't be bothered to take care of their Alzheimer's afflicted mother. So we got to be the responsible ones until she passed earlier this year.
And there is no telling with your brothers and probably isn't anything your folks did raising them since the rest of you sibs turned out ok. Not a nurture thing, more a nature thing....maybe they are wired differently, who knows?
I pray she finds the strength to say no to him before someone gets hurt. Tough love is well, tough! ;-)